Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Updates, Part Deux!

Peace, All. It was pointed out by a reader that I hadn’t gone into much detail about the guys or the dates related to my online advertisement situation when I posted last.  The reason for that is that there have been no dates as of yet.  I’m a 5'3" single woman.  Even "packing heat" – and I neither confirm nor deny that I do – I still need to be careful of where I go alone, particularly to meet someone I don’t know.  Also, It should be noted that I have only been working with my current combination of sites, as well as the particular method of interaction with the sites that I’m using, for about month.  Prior to this time, I was doing more lurking than interacting. But unless you're intent on posting a pic of yourself  with your ass hanging out and/or fit one of the descriptions I alluded to previously, I've found that unlike irl, it's unreasonable to expect loads of men (you would wish to be bothered with) to approach you online.  As such, the going has been slow, but I’ve managed to come across three guys of interest thus far.  I’m not going to use any names or give specific information about anyone I discuss, nor am I going to mention the names of the sites.  That information has been withheld to protect the innocent, namely me.  I'm channeling Aaron McGruder circa 2005, here: "Seriously. I really don't want any of you n*ggas running up on me at the club. I don't have no crew, and ... I know how ya'll n*ggas do."  And with that, let me introduce you all to the first round of draft picks (and what you may imagine they look like)!!

The first round of Contenders are:

Asian #3.  There may be readers among you who are not aware of my affinity for various ethnicities of Asian men. Guys from the UAE? Love ya.  Nepalese men? Beautiful.  To my Vietnamese hotties – xoxo. That being said, I sought out and was receptive to approaches by Asian men from the outset of my online dating adventures.  Which brings us to Asian #3 - wait, number three you ask? Please allow me to elaborate:

The first Asian candidate I seriously considered was American-born Chinese, mid 30’s.  He was seriously gorgeous - like Taeyang’s older brother gorgeous, well educated, well read, family oriented, and well employed.  However, he seemed rather ill-socialized.  After we had begun our correspondence, he actually told me off before we could make any real headway. I’m still not sure what I did to provoke such a response, but meh, “on to da next one,” said Jigga Man.  Asian guy numero dos, an American-raised South Korean in his late twenties, was very adorable and flirty, funny, and a seemingly great candidate for some casual dates if nothing else.  This line of reasoning ended when he told me he’d like to ejaculate on my feet. Yeah.

This brings us to Asian3, as he shall be so named henceforward.  He’s a cute, Chinese PhD student employed in his field, very intelligent and inquisitive, fluent in English, and quite tall which is a nice plus (though not a requirement) for any male suitor of mine.  We’ve been conversing, and he shows all the signs of a normal, well-adjusted human being. 

The Brother – Though I have been seeking to explore more diverse dating interests, there is certainly something to be said for Black dating.  You have a shared culture and are somewhat more likely to share social views; the awkwardness that can occur when enjoying Black media and entertainment with a member of another race isn’t present (if you’re Black and you’ve ever tried to listen to Biggie or watch the Boondocks with someone non-Black, you’ll have my back on this); no explanation of slang is necessary, nor is any discussion about Black female hair care; etc.  Little things like this are not hugely important but when taken as a whole can have a noticeable impact, though not necessarily for good or ill, on a relationship over time.  On the other hand, Black men and women can know each other too well, and that familiarity in part can cause us to play out the same relationship patterns over and over again. So far, I have to say the Brothers (and I'm speaking of various ethnicities here) have been coming correct with theirs.  Certainly there are Black men who will wish to approach you with pictures of themselves in an A-shirt standing in the bathroom mirror, but these people are easily ignored.  The Brother I’m interested in is African-American, handsome, about 40, very well employed, and trendy in an age appropriate manner. We have similar tastes in many things, so we’ll see how it goes.

I still love you, Junito!

The Puertorriqueño – This is actually the first Hispanic male to approach me, though I have approached a few unsuccessfully.  First I will say that though he is very light and probably would be considered White in most parts of the country, he acknowledged his mixed heritage in his profile, which was actually quite a turn on.  Race in places that are still basically colonies is an intriguing set of situations that differs thoroughly from one area to the next.  This is especially true for Puerto Rico which is both part of and not part of the US and, so being, must reconcile the miscegenation culture of its own distinct colonial past with the very differing miscegenation culture and history of the Mainland.  To avoid a number of side rants, I’ll end that discussion here.  Suffice it to say that embracing one’s whole self is a philosophy of mine, and I find it very sexy in a male.  As a matter of fact, our life philosophies and temperaments seem quite similar, and I take this as a good indicator of our compatibility. I’ve always found Boricuas handsome, though I’m open the entire Hispanic Diaspora.  This particular guy is early 30’s, fluent in English, family oriented, employed at a decent level, and free spirited.

With these three guys in mind, I intend to work up to the situation of meeting in public.  I let you all know what happens.



  1. You are hilarious! I shall be keeping up via Google Reader.

  2. OK, first: Thank you! You did not proof-read this, ms. MS almost PhD, but you did try to excite your reader with details on your intent.

    Second: Nice picture of you! you know I will run up on you one day, but I will not say hi because you are afraid to some point and I do not want to scare you off, my friend. i just wont visit that place again!

    Third Thanks.... My Current GF has major issues that I am "being there" fo her to vent / find comfort..... I am so sad that this wonderful world has made our women "packing-heat" to hunt meat that they wont later eat..... With that I will read your post... starting with your first man.

    WOW! Just read the first... A#3... still nothing about what you see to do or what you want to do or where you are going on your first date. ...ejaculate on your feet?? is that a code?? Do you have nice feet? (not to say that that should be done on nice things, and you do have a nice face... and I do not know why they do that on the face in the movies... but now I ramble....)

    OK, the brother. Nothing, sweetie! still nothing about what you see to do or what you want to do or where you are going on your first date. Nothing about how he makes you feel or how warm and at home he makes you feel inside.... Nothing about WHY you would choose him instead of ME! (but I am not hurtin...) I remember what you told me, so I am just sayin...

    OK, the last guy. i wont repeat. i guess sometime in JUNE you will get a date and give this BLOG a peek at your inner emotions and logic. Currently I do not feel ya. Hey, do you have a body? (with clothes) you picture very well...

    If I were to say why I tossed and turned last night, I would say that the School has not contacted me about a job teaching full-time, and my GF is stressing me sexually.

    Her ex- from NJ comes down and I was told that I cannot come over. He stays there for a week and she tells him about me but does not ask me to visit to meet him.... strange. she says she is not sleeping with him.... She is helping him with a business thang he is doing in Fayetteville.. . we talk; she apologizes, we just forget it. I am not mad or upset.... But I would have handled things differently then the way she handled them with me. now the bond is weak. She even now starts to asks ME if I had sex with my current friends, repeatedly. So i play: I tell her that one of my friends is fat and I told her that. She said that was rude and punched me extremely hard three times. So I say who should tell her she is/was FAT? she does not answer.... only says, again, that is rude of me.

    So now I do not want sex... I turn to eating.... Maybe I am a GIRL now! stress...

    So that was my weekend.... Do you FEEL ME?
    ...information has been withheld to protect the innocent... right.
    I am looking for your emotional, detailed reply about your dates and you.

    not stalkin nobody!

    1. thank you, dear reader, for pointing out my mistakes and providing me with this lovely wall of text. you must know how much i appreciate it.

      also, are you familiar with RZA's line "this four-four inch'll make you jump the fence"? Please consider it carefully should you ever happen upon me irl.

      Cheers! ^_^

  3. LOL... what ever happened to the days when people were happy to see ya.... Now they are clutching their 45, and i don't mean brew! I just stay away from people and focus on making the Benjamin's!

    How can one date and get to know someone when there are so many walls to drop?

    June is here Aya! We are looking for you to go out wit yo picks and REPORT! (and if the report is bland... keep trying...)

    love ya blog,

  4. stephanie got married last week... just out of the blue, bang she is married. She must have dated for two months max....